happiness is being alone every now and then...

I've discovered that after coming back from China (yes! I'm back!), I just want to be alone. Maybe I've felt this the whole summer, but definitely more so now. I suppose it's a reaction to being with my mother and my cousin, who annoys me greatly, for the last 3 weeks. I suppose it's also a reaction to all the changes going on in my life, as if everything is seemingly being uprooted and tossed about. I think I just need to get my head cleared and straighten myself out, turn to the Lord, confess, and go on. *sigh* I think I'm just having a hard time in terms of not having a plan for my future. I've always known what I was going to do, but for the first time, my life is unscripted. I know this is the Lord's dealing with my "plan for the future" self. I must turn to the Lord and follow Him. I'm reminded of the message during the summer training where the brother shared on each one having a path that has been ordained by the Lord. We must be faithful to take that path and follow the Lamb to the end. I haven't quite come to that experience, far from it in fact. But I think I'm slowly learning to resign myself into the Lord's hands.